All in the Name of Douchebaggery, or, the Epitome of Being a New York Giants Fan

Minutes after the New York Giants upset the New England Patriots in Super Bowl XLII, I got a text from a Giants fan friend of mine. Some wise ass comment, I fired back with something equally retarded. It was the beginning of two weeks of nothing but Giants fans, and New York-anything fans in general, getting their licks in. The fact is, New York fans will go to any length to stick it to Boston/New England fans.

And now I have proof. Here's Aaron Kaplowitz, writing for the Boston Globe of all newspapers, describing his trip to Central America to find a 19-0 Patriots Super Bowl XLII Champions shirt. As the article's tag line explains, it was a trip for a painful piece of Patriots history, undertaken by a Giants fan. That's a long trip in name of douchebaggery, Mr. Kaplowitz.

Like I said, they're a loathesome bunch.

Annoyed Gym-Goers of the World! Unite!

New York stockbroker and gym-goer Christopher Carter was acquitted of assault charges today stemming from an incident that took place in his spin class some months ago. In that class, investment firm partner Stuart Sugarman began grunting and yelling things like "You go girl!" and "Good burn!" until Carter had had enough, picked up Sugarman's exercise bike by the handles, and dropped it back down on the floor. Sugarman claimed afterwards that the incident left him with injuries that caused a herniated disc in his neck.

All I can think about is the movie Dodgeball.

As a four-year, federal work study veteran of undergraduate gyms, and a gym rat since I was 15, I must applaud Mr. Carter. I cannot count the times I've seen screaming, yelling, grunting meat head fools annoy people to the point where they won't come back to a gym. When I worked in gyms as an undergrad, a week couldn't go by without some obviously insecure and overweight freshman guy or girl being scared away from the gym by these (equally obviously insecure) dirtbags screaming and yelling. It was always sad to see them trudge out the door, discouraged from doing something really good for themselves. I, for one, appauld Carter. It's time someone took back the gym.

So, what's your gym story? What gets your goat at the gym?

Good burn!

PETA wants jockey questioned

PETA wants Gabriel Saez, the jockey who rode Eight Belles in the Kentucky Derby this weekend, questioned regarding his role in the horse's injury and subsequent euthanization. The PETA folks also want "sweeping reforms" in the sport of thoroughbred racing. Hopefully, this will be yet another great, meaningful victory for the PETA folks, such as getting a cruel donkey basketball game called off in Delaware, and preventing Subaru and CDW from cruelly training chimps to act in commercials. Cause as we all know, there's nothing more cruel for a chimp than putting him in swim trunks or having him pitch the official car of the People's Republic of Vermont.