Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Signs the end is nigh

The Associated Press is reporting that Oprah Winfrey is getting her own TV network in 2009. Yes, that's right, the Oprah Winfrey Network, or OWN. It'll be replacing the Discovery Health network.

So, we can infer a couple of things from this. The first, and easiest, is that the world is coming to an end, so please promptly tuck your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye. It's been good knowing you.

Second, we live in a truly retarded society. Discovery is about to replace a network geared towards teaching people how to life healthy with an entire network pretty much devoted to making you feel better about sitting on your butt all day long. This is easily a market decision: Oprah sells better than health, so Oprah gets (this is still hard to wrap my mind around) an entire network.

Say it with me, just for the effect: her entire network.

Truly, a sad, sad society.


Shane Rollins said...

I think we need our own network to counter Oprah's, we shall call it PWN

SayHey Kid said...

Xrist!! Just what we need, more blathering, chicken cluck networks.

Kim said...

You guys really need some girls on here. Oprah rocks...that's right, I said it. Oprah kicks ass and it's awesome she is getting her own network. I will definitely be watching. Boys, go back into your hole...you know, that one filled with football and computers.

Shane Rollins said...

Awesome? I'm sorry but 1.)I cannot forgive her for unleashing Dr. Phil onto the world 2.)I don't need her to tell me what book to read 3.)I don't need some lady to tell me to be happy in my life