Friday, January 25, 2008

Happy Friday

Happy Friday everyone. Last night was a neat night for me. I got pulled over for speeding, and got off with a warning. What was cool was that the officer that pulled me over was a woman. And hot. I have a buddy on the force. I'm totally getting her number.

Let's see, news for today. First, Randy Moss will be catching balls in the Super Bowl, not answering the battery lawsuit in Florida. That's not totally news, but I love the fact that Randy's lawyer flat out called the suit (in ESPN-speak) "bullsh--." Awesome, counselor Sharpstein. But, really, don't we all want to see Randy hire this guy? (may require you to scroll up)

We all know that politicians should be careful about showing their emotions. A well-placed tear during a moving event or a hearty chuckle with a big lush are okay. Telling your mayoral assistant you're madly in love with her, especially after your city spent $9 million on a whistle blower trial, is not. Also, after you read that, tell me if I had this right: did they actually send 14,000 text messages to each other over two months? Is that even possible?

I'm still pissed about Dana Jacobson (link with vodka-riffic pic). Kelly Tilghman got two weeks for the lynch comment. Jacobson waited two weeks to apologize and was suspended a couple days. Yet another example of ESPN's growing suckage.

The New York Times has endorsed Hillary Clinton in the primaries. It's not a suprise, really, but as the rest of the crew here will tell you, it's not the right choice. The gist of their endorsement: Hillary has the (ugh) experience to hit the ground running and get things done. Fine. I know she will get things done. I question what those things will be if she's elected. She represents an entrenched approach to solving problems, and her presidency would result in the collection of power in the hands of a few. There may be change, but it will only be a switch from the conservative elite to the liberal elite. We need someone else.

Lastly, only 22 days until pitchers and catchers report. That's effing awesome.

35 comments:

SayHey Kid said...

I agree, Dana Jacobson is a shitty person and should get fired. However, dont be so harsh on Kelly Tilghman. She was honest about her mistake and apologized to Tiger immediatly, which resulted in a quick forgiveness. The media blew this way out of proportion as did the NAACP. And of course now Jim Brown.

Side Note- ESPN usually is tough on bad publicity; just look at Harold Reynolds. ESPN hardly sucks and to think that is ignorant, but they do tend to be more forgiving toward their female reporters.

SayHey Kid said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dews said...

They were pretty forgiving to that thug Irving too...

They seem to be very selective in who they bring the hammer down on sometimes.

SayHey Kid said...

What did Irving to to insult ESPN? He shot himself in the foot with that drug bust. He didnt say anything stupid on the air or to another ESPN employee.

Shane Rollins said...

What did she say that was so bad? She went off and yelled and cursed Notre Dame, who here hasn't done that?

DC&H-I see you're going all Raising Arizona on us

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

I'm not trying to be tough on Tilghman. From what I understand, she's actually Tiger's friend and really made a horribly stupid comment. But the point stands. Tilghman made a mistake, owned up to it immediately, paid the price, and now, in my mind, she can move on. Jacobson went nuts, took two weeks to apologize, gave a half-hearted apology, and gets a couple days off. And that's after some really classless comments. Doesn't seem right.

I don't think it's ignorant at all to be critical of ESPN. Its main programming covers a very narrow set of sports, and the analysis offered during that programming is at times very shallow. I compare it to CNN nowadays. It's about headlines and entertainment value, not about sports news.

Are you familar with the term "jumping the shark"? I think that news networks jump the shark when they go from reporting to entertainment. I think that ESPN has jumped the shark with some of its programming.

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

Raising Arizona? I haven't seen that movie in ten years. I know Nick Cage is in it. The reference is lost on me.

Shane Rollins said...

Nic Cage, the con, ends up marrying the cop who takes his mug shot picture

SayHey Kid said...

I couldnt agree with your more on Jacobson, she is a jackass who gets no sympothy from me.

ESPN offers exactly what they sports fans want. Tons of Baseball and tons of Football and excellent analysis for both. Im not sure how popular curling is in Vermont but ESPN covers that also.

As for analysis shows, you need to get over it!! Its a new generation of media and I dont think any channel is immune to this trend. I dont like alot of it but at least ESPN makes it entertaining. Thanks Jim Rome!

SayHey Kid said...

Im alittle lost as well DC&H. It was an awesome movie though.

Shane- It wasnt that she went off and yelled at ND, she was beyond drunk and was stupid about it

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

I know right where you're coming from on the new generation of news coverage. Drew Curtis had a link about this on Fark.com yesterday. I guess that I resist consumer-driven news, bright, flashy pictures, and overly-Botoxed hosts. In short, I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it any more.

As far as live sports, I understand that. I'm happy now that Versus has picked up hockey and rugby.

Let's not jump ahead of ourselves on the cop thing fellas. I got stopped by a cute cop, and I'm going to do a little investigating. I'm not anxious for wedding bells.

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

No, no...it was the fuck Jesus part which was absurd. When you combine that with fuck Notre Dame, it adds a different tone.

SayHey Kid said...

I didnt know this topic was on Fark, I just put 2 and 2 together. ESPN ignited my interest in College Basketball and College Football to. I think Dick Vitale not being on the air helps also

So how did the cop thing go. Did you flash her some skin?? What does she look like?? Details man, details!!

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

Cop thing went like this:

My dad and I played poker last night, and that got out at 10:30. I was starving, so after I dropped my dad off at my parents' house, I went to get food. As I was driving, I noticed a car behind me. I didn't really pay any attention until the blue lights turned on.

Now, I've been in some minor trouble recently, so I was a little apprehensive about it. Basically, another scrape and no driving for me for a little while. So, I pulled over, turned off my car, and tried to gather my lawyer magic.

I was fully expecting some dude cop to come up and bust my balls. I hear the cop walk up to my car, and I turn to look and...

Whoa. Not a dude.

It took me a good three seconds to process everything. My first instinct was to grin uncontrolably. That would've been terrible, so I tried to chill, but I'm thinking that the combination of emotions here (grin uncontrolably vs. supress uncontrolable grin vs. oh shit I could lose my license vs. I want to fight because I'm a lawyer and you're a cop) made me into a bumbling idiot.

As far as features, I couldn't really say. She had a pretty face. I could tell that she was in shape, which is good, you know? Brown hair. Doesn't matter...it was a the uniform for some reason. And I have a feeling I know her from somewhere. Anyway, if you've listened to Henry Rollins' spoken word album "A Rollins in the Wry," and know the part about the female Israeli soldiers, well, you get the notion.

She let me go with a warning. Told me to slow down. But, damn, whatever she was working, she was hot. I have a buddy who works for her police dept. I'm doing some recon for sure.

Shane Rollins said...

Ah Henry...when it comes to Henry and what he says he wants in a woman he and I agreed on the same thing...

I want one of dem readers

Dews said...

There is something very hot about a woman in uniform. Pretty much any uniform I think.

I'm shocked to hear there are female cops up north though...

I know the Sheriff of Orange county though Dewey, mayhap can do some recon as well :)

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

I can and will do recon. I got nothing better to do.

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

Well, for now I don't have anything better to do :)

SayHey Kid said...

Very nice my friend. I went on a date with a former IDF chick, she showed me a pic of her in uniform and i nearly passed out.

She was Hotter than a barrel of fire in that uni.

Dews said...

Barrel???

Dunno if I'd use a barrel to equate to hotness... How about Hourglass?

I've heard the term "Barrel-Chested", but not with the ladies...

SayHey Kid said...

Barrel is a container of items.......In her case, contained alot of hotness.

But my point is, women in uniforms are quite attractive.

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

I prefer bucket to barrel. A bucket of hotness. Or a bucket of pure awesome. Barrels are large, and I don't dig large women.

SayHey Kid said...

Things can escape a bucket. You want to preseve that beauty in a barrel. Just like you would a fine beer. And if I keep mentioning that, Olneygirl will snap off my c*ck

Im shocked your not getting my point her Dews!

SayHey Kid said...

er Here....DC&H

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

I know what you're getting at, but bucket allows for some cuteness. I can't imagine a cute barrel. No one has ever said "oh, what a cute barrel!" Buckets allow for the possibility. I can imagine some bucket with pink flowers and rainbows and shit. That'd be cute, or so I'm told.

I just jumped the shark.

Dews said...

Yea, I understand the whole container portion, but Barrel AND Bucket just seem like strange container comparisons...

There has to be a better way!

Dews said...

how about a Plethora of hotness?

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

How about a satchel?

SayHey Kid said...

I have never heard of a cute bucket. What do you put in a bucket other than dirty car wash filth? I would put flowers in a pot or in the ground =)

Barrels help make wine and beer taste delicious.

HA, We must be absolutly bored to be debating this

Dews said...

ohh, I like that better, or sack maybe? Fanny-pack? canteen? camelback? knapsack?

SayHey Kid said...

A quiver maybe?

Dews said...

I just killed too many brain cells last night to do anything more productive then this...

how about decanter? (sp?)

That has a nice shape to is...

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

A decanter of hotness. I like that. That way she can pour her hotness out to (on?) me.

You're right about being bored. There's only so much lawyering that can be done in a week, and I may have exceeded my limit.

SayHey Kid said...

You should visit DC, where there are more crimes than actual residents!

Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe said...

Yeah, but I do environmental. Basically I read maps all day long, read reports, and try to cut through the "bullsh--" as ESPN would say.

G-d, that's so funny. Why put dashes as the last two letters? Wtf is the point?