Round The Bend 10.13.08

On today's edition of Round The Bend…

• We discuss the utter failure of the Redskins yesterday
  
• SayHey's Birthday over the weekend and Dews' ability to speak in tongues
  
• Sarah Palin's complete lack of knowledge about the Philly Sports Fan aka the folks who booed Santa
  
• The new number one College Football team in the country, whose house runs house?!
  

JackGonzo: Good Morning Everyone and welcome to Round The Bend

JackGonzo: as attempt to be Switzerland between German Kitty and French Puppy

10:32 AM as I

Dews: Let be the first to Congratulate Gonzo on his #1 Rankings

Dews: Red River rivalry seemed to work out for ya

JackGonzo: EVERYTHING seemed to work out for us this weekend

JackGonzo: OK State beat Mizzo

PhillyFan: its there

10:33 AM JackGonzo: LSU was as bad as I told everyone they were

JackGonzo: but that's not the number one story of the weekend

Dews:so is this a "Holiday edition"?

of chat

10:38 AM JackGonzo: well lets make that topic number one....how bout them Skins?

Dews: ug

obviously a team looking to next week

finally was hyped as the favorite, and totally ignored how much parity there is in Football if you don't plan and play hard

10:39 AM JackGonzo: of all the scores I expected to see yesterday, losing to Jim Haslett? Not one of them

Someone give SayHey the electric shock

Dews: he may still be recovering

JackGonzo: well the seahawks always did find ways to lose to the Rams the last few years

10:40 AM Dews: we just looked like a team going through the motions and making obvious mental mistakes

we hadn't had an offensive turnover until that game afterall

10:41 AM JackGonzo: completely spent last week?

Dews: and looked positively "Romo-esque" all game with puttin the ball on the carpet

Speaking of, my heart goes out to "Boys" fans for Homo-Romo's broken Pinky...

Dews: Poor Romo...

I sure hope he heals quickly....

PhillyFan: hahaha

JackGonzo: Let's talk about "this year's super bowl champions" how bout dem cowboys?!

Dews: yes, clearly just as good as the 07 Patriots

as everyone was saying

JackGonzo: clearly

Hell, all Kurt Warner needs right now is Marshall Faulk

10:44 AM Dews: James and Hightower seem like passable options

you get a healthy Boldin back in there, thats a scary team

JackGonzo: Memo to Detroit, this is how you actually draft receivers

Dews: Detroit needs to never draft a receiver again

10:45 AM they should just admit they're cursed, and move on

JackGonzo: the only good one they drafted....to steal a line from prime time...where'd he go to school? Texas

Dews: yea exactly

10:46 AM JackGonzo: Topic number two, how totally trashed did Dews get at SayHey's birthday?

Dews: <----------------------> this much

MoDews: He stopped speaking English

10:47 AM Dews: I was speaking a Vermont dialect

known as "Granitevillian"

JackGonzo: You should have called the RNC if he was speaking in tounges

JackGonzo: he then could of given the benediction thing at the beginning of congress

10:48 AM Dews: good call, maybe I could still do that

I don't recall being that trashed

I do recall being ill though

JackGonzo: Yes, but it must have been pretty bad pretty early if MoDews remembers

10:50 AM Dews: MoDews was feelin that Pina Colada from the Caps game too

not like he was all innocent

PhillyFan: New window worked...finally in!

Dews: thats... what she said?

JackGonzo: I feel bad talking bout SayHey's birthday without him, but he's an old man now and shouldn't be sleeping at work

10:51 AM Dews: agreed

SayHey: Hey Hey

Dews: there he is

SayHey: FUnny, just checked my email

Punks

Working from home is exhausting

JackGonzo: Pay more attention grandpas

SayHey: =/

Noodle: hey sorry i gotta head into work gmail is blocked at work

JackGonzo: I know SayHey is in an interesting conundrum

SayHey: Soon, youll know my pain

Noodle: i can't believe the skins lost to the poo poo rams

Dews: agreed Noodle

10:52 AM SayHey: Yeh, Redskins lost that fight

Dews: was painful

Noodle: i'm already feeling it but hanging in there

PhillyFan: I missed the last two minutes of that game

although Morrison must have been happy I wasn't there to laugh at him

Dews: yea, it was probably best you left early Philly Fan

SayHey: Yeh, lots of drama in that one

PhillyFan: like he did to me last week

JackGonzo: Can't talk shit to PhillyFan about the game yesterday...and he can't talk shit about the Phillies cause then that gives good reviews to the Dodgers...good thing he's probably still hungover

SayHey: Philly fan...........grrrrrr so angry

10:53 AM PhillyFan: :)

Gooo Niners

SayHey: Yeh, Bridget, you win this battle =)

Dews: yea really, wha happen Niners???

JackGonzo: Let's get to topic number three real quick before we just dive into the playoffs

SayHey: I saw improvements, but it all boils down to a solid QB

PhillyFan: Next week you have giants, right?

SayHey: Which we dont have

10:54 AM JackGonzo: and PhillyFan should enjoy this one

As we all know Sarah Palin dropped the puck at the Flyers (booo hisss) home opener on Saturday

PhillyFan: I saw!

Jimmie posted it

hilarious...

10:55 AM JackGonzo: now, this tells you how little Ms Palin understands things outside of Alaska

Looks like Sarah brought her daughters along as a human shields:

The GOP Vice-Presidential nominee said at an earlier fundraiser that she would stop some of the booing from the rowdy Philadelphia fans by putting her seven year old daughter, Piper in a Flyers jersey. She said, "How dare they boo Piper!"

PhillyFan: :)

10:56 AM Dews: didn't they boo some really famous guy a while ago that gives stuff away to people?

<-- Promised not to joke about that anymore though...

SayHey: Bullshit Dews

JackGonzo: Now, does this show out of touch Govenbabe is if she doesn't understand or know about Philly's reputation?

SayHey: We will ALWAYS joke about that

PhillyFan:
Palin booed in Philly

SayHey: Ah, quick drop in.....Romo out for 4 weeks. YAY

PhillyFan: Yup!

10:57 AM heard that one... poor Romo... ;)

Dews: Ohhhhh Pooooooooor Roooomooooooo

Jessica must be heart broken

Noodle: i gotta run to work i will ttyl send me an e-mail transcript

JackGonzo: She must be thrilled

10:58 AM Dews: will do Noodle

Noodle: eric i want to hear how your bday went

SayHey: I havent seen that much booing since Santa

No joke

JackGonzo: this mean she gets to tend to his every need

and he will go absolutely insane having to listen to her talk

10:59 AM though then they will break up and if history tells us anything, as with Lachey, he will move up in the world with something smarter and hotter

SayHey: Noodle- Birthday went great

Played rockband 2 until I lost my voice

JackGonzo: Yes, let's hear birthday stories as when that was happening I was on my feet all day selling shit

11:00 AM SayHey: WIsh you and Jack were in town for the celebrations

Dews: it was a lot of fun

PhillyFan: I took a nap on Dews' bed

SayHey: Yeh, Friday night we had about 15 peeps (incuding my mom) goto Acadiana for a nice dinner

Then party at the house Saturday night

PhillyFan: Fun party...I think

SayHey: Think??

Dews: it was a lotta fun

11:01 AM JackGonzo: Strange women taking naps on strange beds, next on maury

SayHey: And that Rays win in the 11th wqas the perfect end to that night

Dews: PhillyFan was a lil sauced

PhillyFan: You remember me. haha I don't know details

I was tired :)

SayHey: Well........You dont remember because you, well, you know =)

Tired = something else

But yeh, Rachel made a Wii cake

JackGonzo: in the famous words of the original LT...totally trashed

SayHey: It was fricken awesome and tastey

11:02 AM JackGonzo: ah so that's what that picture is

SayHey: Well, Phillyfan was renamed Ricky Williams Sat night

Yeh

Dews: haha

PhillyFan: I didn't have any cake! But Dia made some really good apps too... and there were little Say Hey "Mii" things

haha wow thanks.

Blame CowboysFan: for that...I do :)

11:03 AM SayHey: CowboysFan was Cheech

JackGonzo: we always blame CowboyFan for that

no, CowboyFan is Chong

SayHey: LOL true

11:04 AM But it was good times never the less. Again, it would have been even better had Jack and Noodle been in VA

You were both missed

Dews: truly

but yea, was a great time

JackGonzo: My feet still haven't recovered from standing for ten hours at a time in ren boots on Saturday and Sunday, though I did make some good cash

11:05 AM it would have been awesome to have been there, and I tried, but at least I'm somewhat working now

SayHey: Oh, most understandable

We have the bachelor party in March

So plenty of party time

Oh, I may have missed this, but congrats on Texas being #1

JackGonzo: in the words of Paul Bearer ohhhhh yessssssss

11:06 AM SayHey: lol

I think we will book the flight this weekend, and pass on whatever information to you afterwards

JackGonzo: For Nawlins?

Cause I'm driving

Dews: yepper

11:07 AM JackGonzo: Cause...I can

SayHey: Well, more definite time and dates

Go and drive, its cheaper and quicker for you

PhillyFan: How long is that drive?

11:08 AM JackGonzo: google maps says 5.5 hours

so about 4

SayHey: All Gonzo needs is some Henry Rollins to cut the drive time

Get him fired up = Lead foot

JackGonzo: hell during that time I'll just be listening to the tournament

11:09 AM PhillyFan: Nice... That city was great....loved it once I finally made it there

Dews: tournament?

SayHey: NCAA

Dews: ahh right

March...

JackGonzo: Now there's an important question we have for SayHey...does this change your vote?

Dean Smith Endorses Obama

SayHey: Nah, I was never a real UNC hater

Just Duke

11:10 AM If it were coach K, id have to vote for Mickey Mouse

Dews: I swear they put something into the water in the DC area to hate Duke, cause I do too for no reason at all

hell, they even won me some money

JackGonzo: you know if we got Jordan, Woods and Gretzkey to come out for Obama it would be over

SayHey: lol, well, VCU knocked em out in the tourney 2 years ago

11:11 AM I feel complete ownership over them

Oh, Gonzo

Dews: well, Catamounts lost to them 4 years ago after beating Syracuse, so I guess that could be a reason

SayHey: Take on Butch Davis and UNC football?

He is red hot

11:12 AM JackGonzo: Why? Cause he beat Notre Dame? I could get a bunch of local kids together and beat Notre Dame right now

SayHey: Well, UNC was shit for many years

JackGonzo: Well ever since Mack Brown left...

SayHey: Turned atound the entire program

JackGonzo: of course, he's a great college guy

11:13 AM SayHey: Shitty pro coach

JackGonzo: we saw the talent he produced at the U...half the NFL are former U players

11:15 AM So 538's latest projection has Obama with almost a 94% win percentage

McCain's numbers are below that of Bush right now

11:16 AM Dews: last polls I was seeing averaged a 8-10 point advantage for Obama

nationally that is

PhillyFan: Wow...someone won't be happy when he gets back from Easter Island

to civilization

11:17 AM Dews: serves him rght

gallavanting with some random exotic culture

JackGonzo: lol

11:18 AM he's supposed to be America Gawd damnit

Dews: Fuck Ya!

JackGonzo: now, this is an interesting theory

Drudge Predicting Reboot

11:19 AM Dews: actually, I'm really surprised that Drudge would be pimping McCain

as McCain overall is not a "Drudge" type candidate

11:20 AM I think a lotta these right wingers are just swallowing hard and saying "screw it", I'll TRY to support him

or at least look like I am to keep my street cred

PhillyFan: That might be true

JackGonzo: Well there is the theory that the Republican Party is just saying fuck it, giving the democrats this election, and hoping to hell that they hang themselves with the rope they've been given

11:21 AM Dews: they really should just concentrate on House and senate races, since the Obama factor is having the most influence on those at the moment

Dems stand to gain significant seats in both

gonna be a rubber stamp congress it looks

just to bad they won't have any money to do anything

and a shit-ton of things to resolve

11:22 AM JackGonzo: This the Republicans know...they know everything is fucked up, like a 16 year old who had a party and the parents are coming home early

11:23 AM Dews: the Palins?

ohhhh, that didn't result in a pregnancy, got it

JackGonzo: what are you talking about? She works from home remember? She'd be the mom supplying the liquor, cause Jesus told her to

11:24 AM Dews: my bad Gonzo

JackGonzo: but this is encouraging news

In the latest Gallup tracking poll, Mr. Obama leads Mr. McCain 50 percent to 43 percent among registered voters. Mr. McCain's deficit in that survey has remained seven percentage points or more for most of the last two weeks.

Since Gallup began presidential polling in 1936, only one candidate has overcome a deficit that large, and this late, to win the White House: Ronald Reagan, who trailed President Jimmy Carter 47 percent to 39 percent in a survey completed on Oct. 26, 1980.

11:25 AM Dews: kind of ominous to use Carter as a reference

11:26 AM JackGonzo: a lil

but it is pleasing to see the VA is a solid Obama state now

though SayHey and Dews need to work on their women and get Indiana on the Obamagon

Dews: yes, all because of us Commnists in NoVa

11:27 AM thats a reach there Jack

other then Bayh, I don't see many folks having success as a "terrorist sympathizer" in Indiana

JackGonzo: right now Indiana looks split

11:28 AM Dews: it has some very progressive parts to it, but overall....

not so much

11:29 AM and I believe SayHey's fiancee is a DC voter

so, don't think that'll help

JackGonzo: DC has voters?

Dews: they don't count, but ya

11:30 AM JackGonzo: and with that, we'll end today, with the only person having a good weekend out of this group was me.

Dews: oh no, I had a great weekend

just not sports wise

JackGonzo: Not only did my team win, we are now number...just win baby

Dews: congrats again man

11:31 AM JackGonzo: Memo to Sooner Nation...suck it, suck it long suck it hard...good night now!

NFL Thoughts After Week 2

No team has had worse luck this season then Jimmie's San Diego Chargers. They just barely lose in week one, and were robbed in week 2.

No team at 0-2 surprises me more then the Jaguars, who at one time were my super bowl pick. I don't know what's wrong, but Del Rio better fix it quick.

DeSean Jackson has surprised many folks so far this season, even if he doesn't know where the goal line is.

The Niners are starting to show why I picked them to be my NFC West Champs.

Brett Favre couldn't even beat a quarterback who hasn't started a game since his Senior High School season.

Why won't Phil Savage listen to me and trade Donte Stallworth, and next year's first round pick to Arizona for Anquan Boldin?

Speaking of the Browns, if Romeo Crennel can't turn this thing around don't be surprised if Bill Cowher comes home to Cleveland to finally right this ship.

The Kansas City Chiefs may have the ability to achieve the unbelievable dream of a winless team.

Then again, the Dolphins may have that ability as well.

The Bills will be the team to win the AFC East, mark my words.

Now that I think about it, the Bengals could be the team to go winless as well.

I feel bad for Carson Palmer for playing for the Bengals, the guy has had some of the worst luck of anyone in the NFL.

Is Willis McGahee ever gonna play and get me some fantasy points?

I am completely for changing rookie contracts to look something like the NBA contracts that have a maximum for each pick in the draft depending on order. To offset pissing off the agents, allow them to incentive based to add some of that extra money.

Jim Zorn has done a surprisingly good job with the Redskins so far.

DeMarcus Ware is a man beast and the Eagles are lucky he didn't kill McNabb last night.

Eddie Royal, the first solid NFL player from Virginia Tech since Bruce Smith? Time will tell.

Has any team been affected as much by injuries as the Browns have? Two weeks and at least six starters hurt each game, and yet they've had their chances to win both games at times.

Missing, Braylon Edwards hands, if found please contact the Cleveland Browns front office.

I would still like to see a restructuring of MLB and the addition of two more teams, while moving the Marlins from Florida. Yes, it isn't on the NFL but the thought is still in my head.

Hall of Fame Game

Not sure if anyone caught the game tonight (which will forever be known as Colt Brennan of "Rainbow Warrior" fame's coming out party), but our "Skins" pulled out a victory over the much hated Indianapolis Colts and their bible thumping jackass coach Tony Dungy...

Just wanted to share a few inspirational words, that I'm sure SayHey will enjoy IMMENSELY, since he is now an official Skins fan and all :)

Ahem....

Hail to the Redskins!
Hail Victory!
Braves on the Warpath!
Fight for old D.C.!

Run or pass and score -- we want a lot more!
Beat 'em, Swamp 'em,
Touchdown! -- Let the points soar!
Fight on, fight on 'Til you have won
Sons of Wash-ing-ton. Rah!, Rah!, Rah!
Hail to the Redskins!
Hail Victory!
Braves on the Warpath!
Fight for old D.C.!

ahh, that is all

NFL Draft Review NFC East

This may cause some excitement because I don't agree with a lot of what these alleged experts have been saying about Washington's draft. Getting players is one thing, but if you already have people at that position and don't fill positional needs, what good does it really do you?

DALLAS COWBOYS
NEEDS: RB, WR, CB, ILB, OL
Draft Picks: RB Felix Jones, DB Mike Jenkins, TE Martellus Bennett, RB Tashard Choice, DB Orlando Scandrick, DL Erik Walden
Approved Picks: Jenkins, Scandrick
Eventual Busts: Bennett, Choice
Review: I can't give the Cowboys too hard of a time because they allowed us to move up in the fourth round...twice. Once again this April Jerry Jones has been our Santa Claus. An interesting draft, and one I'm not sure how I feel about. Yes, I know you're going to lose Marion Barber to the Texans next year so Felix Jones was a needed pick in a way, but he's not a number one running back. He won't be able to run the ball every down, and you always need that to succeed in the NFL. Now their selection of Mike Jenkins and Orlando Scandrick is phe-nominal. Jenkins can turn into a real shut down corner and Scandrick will be a special teams destroyer and could develop into a very good nickel back. Add those with the addition of Pacman Jones, if he's reinstated, and that secondary that was questionable just became Eli Manning's worst nightmare. As for Tashard Choice, I'm not sold on him like everyone else. Yes, he's put up good numbers in college but so did Blair Thomas.
GRADE: B-

NEW YORK GIANTS
NEEDS: OL, LB, DB
Draft Picks: DB Kenny Phillips, DB Terrell Thomas, WR Mario Manningham, LB Bryan Kehl, LB Jonathan Goff, QB André Woodson, DE Robert Henderson
Approved Picks: Phillips, Thomas, Kehl, Goff
Eventual Busts: Manningham
Review: I don't understand how some folks don't like this draft. To me this is one of the best drafts, period. Phillips is likely going to be a better safety then Wilson was, Thomas will compete for one of the starting corner spots and if not that then the nickel, which he would be devastating at. Bryan Kehl is not known by many because he played at Mormon U. but this kid may end up being better then Mitchell. Goff has time to learn behind Pierce and eventually take over for him. Henderson is serviceable and helps with the depth if Strahan retires. The only knock I have on this draft is Mario Manningham. It seemed like this past year he began to listen to his own press and really stopped giving an effort. He went from amazing the year before to a wide receiver who was always dropping balls. Think Randy Moss with the Oakland Raiders, that's how Manningham was playing. Now I'm sure the Giants thinking is, we're not gonna let that kind of attitude of play take place on this team, which they definitely seem to have developed the mentality of doing. So if they get Manningham in the right frame of mind the pick becomes a huge asset. This is the defending world champions, a team that beat the unbeatable, and they just improved a defense that stopped the greatest show since the greatest show on turf.
GRADE: A-

PHILADELPHIA EAGLES
NEEDS: OL, WR, DL, S
Draft Picks: DL Trevor Laws, WR DeSean Jackson, DL Bryan Smith, OL Mike McGlynn, DB Quintin Demps, DB Jack Ikegwuonu, OL Mike Gibson, LB Joe Mays, DL Andrew Studebaker, OL King Dunlap
Approved Picks: Laws, Demps, Jackson, McGlynn
Eventual Busts: Smith, Ikegwuonu, Dunlap
Review: For the second year in a row the Eagles had a very interesting draft. I like their move of trading down to add more picks so they can add more value, especially this year when it comes to their needs. Trevor Laws was a great pick for them in the second round, the defensive tackle the Niners SHOULD have taken. I think Demps is a tremendous steal in the fourth round and finally gives them a safety to put back there with Dawkins. DeSean Jackson isn't the standout wide receiver that McNabb needs, but what he will bring to the table to help the Eagles with is his return game. I won't be surprised to see him have a career very similar to Dante Hall. Now they reached a bit with their small school selections of Bryan Smith, Joe Mays and Andrew Studebaker. To me the most intriguing of those three is Studebaker who already has the size and I think will eventually end up a starter for the Eagles. Call it a hunch, but out of those three he seems to me to be the one to be on the team three years from now. I however don't understand the logic of drafting Ikegwuonu and Dunlap. Ikwegwuonu has red flags all around him stemming from a robbery, but Andy Reid may have thought it was one of his kids so I guess we can give him a pass. Dunlap is such an underachiever that he eventually lost his starting job to a freshman this last year. In the end, the draft class is about 50 50 of who will still be on the team in three years and who won't be.
GRADE: C+

WASHINGTON REDSKINS
NEEDS: OL, WR, DL, S, LB
Draft Picks: WR Devin Thomas, TE Fred Davis, WR Malcolm Kelly, OL Chad Rinehart, DB Justin Tryon, P Durant Brooks, DB Kareem Moore, QB Colt Brennan, DL Rob Jackson, DB Chris Horton
Approved Picks: Rinehart, Tyron, Jackson
Eventual Busts: Thomas, Kelly
Review: People have been praising the Redskins for this draft and for the life of me I can't understand why. Devin Thomas had ONE productive year at Michigan State. People tried to blame it on the old coach Howard Dean, but Dean was coaching when Charles Rogers was putting up ungodly numbers so don't give me that jive. I thought Fred Davis was the best tight end in this draft, but when your team's most beloved player is the tight end, why draft one when you have needs elsewhere? Now I would take Kelly over Thomas, but why draft both of them? My only conclusion is that the Redskins are bringing back the run and shoot offense and they need four receivers and two tight ends. I love the pick of Chad Rinehart, I think he has tremendous upside especially when you look at who he will be learning from as that offensive line has some solid blockers with plenty of experience. I also like the late picks of Tyron and Jackson. Jackson fits that defensive line and Tyron is the kind of hard nosed hitter that the secondary needs after the death of Sean Taylor. My complaint about this draft is obviously the picks in the second round while completely over looking the obvious needs you have elsewhere. I like the pick of Brennan and I'm sure dews and SayHey will be looking for him in local bars and have a drink with him. The only thing I can think of is that the Redskins haven't been used to having so many picks in a draft and forgot how to draft.
GRADE: B-

It appears you are practiced at worshiping things that fly...good

With news that the Redskins hired Jim Zorn as their new Head Coach, promoting him from Offensive Coordinator (without actually having coached a game at said position) a thought occured to me right away. As the faithful know, we love making and attempting to sell shirts here of LSWTF.com, so it was only natural that my first though was how to make money off of delusional Redskin fans.

With that in mind, Head Coach Zorn should feel honored I would even put his name with one of our candidates for President, that is to put his name where the candidates usually is. So, without further ado I give to you our new t-shirt.

Who the Hell Should they Hire??

Very fun video regarding Dan Snyders coaching dilema. This video gives him plenty of coaching options. Even my personal favorite, Coach Mooch!! I could see myself being a TINY bit of a Redskins fan if they hired Steve Mariucci. This clip, I dedicate to our very own Dews! Enjoy