Happy MLK Day

I know there are plenty who think it's very fitting that MLK Day is occuring a day before we have our first black president sworn in. Many believe that if he hadn't been assassinated that Martin Luther King Jr would have been the first black president if he hadn't been taken from us far too early. I'm sure he's somewhere out there smiling down at this day.

It's also the day to find the Arizona Cardinals in the Super Bowl for the first time. I should quote WaitingForNextYear.com about this...

During the Super Bowl era, of the teams that have existed for more than 50 years, only three teams hadn’t made an appearance on the game’s biggest stage. You can cross the Cardinals off that list. To quote the great George Costanza in “the contest” episode after Elaine dropped out - “And then…..there were two.”

The Detroit Lions and your Cleveland Browns.

Not gonna lie, that's fucking embarassing.

The Browns and the Lions, though you could argue that it isn't COMPLETELY true, since the Ravens won and that was the team and that you could argue that this team has only been around for a decade. Sure they have the same records, team colors, etc, but they were created like an exspansion team and have yet to have solid leadership anywhere. Hopefully Mangini and crew will change that.

Now I don't know what everyone is planning tonight, but I was thinking of a livechat to go over the last eight years and what we're expecting in the next few. Of course I'll have enough rum in me to blind a pirate, so it should be interesting enough...

The Brand New Feature

We here at LSWTF have noticed the decline or any responsibility and or dedication on our part to do anything of value on the blog. We could blame it on the post-election concussion syndrome, or the football season. In the end they are all excuses so expect to see many changes in the coming weeks, including actual updates on a regular basis.

Today I give to you my newest venture, LSWTF LOLs.

Round The Bend 10.14.08

On this truly wondrous morning that awakens to a world where Eli Manning has gone back to being Eli Manning…

• We discuss the greatest game the Browns have had since they returned to Cleveland
  
• SayHey's possible comedy movie that is his future Honeymoon
  
• The LCS, Molina clan, and Michael Barrett
  
• John McCain and the desperate acts of a desperate man
  

JackGonzo: Good Morning Everyone and welcome to a particular raining Tuesday, least in Houston, but a day where is sunshine coming out of my ass

Dews: totally agreed...

SayHey: Im shocked you didnt go on an all night bindge

9:30 AM Dews: Thank you for spanking Manning Gonzo

SayHey: Yes, thank you

Oh Dews, Shawn Alexander is working out with the Skins

JackGonzo: We popped Eli's lil bubble and Mr. SanDiego should be the happiest...cept for maybe PhillyFan

Dews: oh yea, read that last night, to replace Betts

SayHey: Eli looked like the half retard we all grew to love

9:31 AM JackGonzo: Have fun with that...oh and have fun this week Dews

You know, with your hurt corners and the like

and with a returning Soldja

Dews: yea, Smoot is coming back though

JackGonzo: with the Love Boat?

SayHey: What ever happened to Soldja boy?

Dews: ya, wtf was the "Undisclosed illness"?

he goin through drug rehab?

SayHey: I guess his father never told him about STDs

9:32 AM Dews: hahaha

JackGonzo: We don't know, we've been trying to think

SayHey: Im sure it was the Clap

JackGonzo: CityCat thinks something embarassing like Chicken Pox

SayHey: At least it wasnt a broken pinky

Dews: Chicken pox for the genitals....

JackGonzo: ask the Cowboys, the Clap doesn't keep you from playing football

SayHey: LOL

Dews: Romo's Pinky thing is ridiculous

9:33 AM I'm sorry, pull a Ronnie Lott, cut it off and get our ass back on the field

SayHey: Well, im sure the Cowboys have the secret remedy for the clap locked away

Dews: Cocaine

SayHey: Agreed

Cocaine cures all ailments

JackGonzo: Cocaines a wonderful drug

SayHey: That is is, Rick

9:34 AM Either way, my vote is on the Clap, or another STD of equal or greater value

JackGonzo: which brings us to topic numero uno today. Did the five fingers say something last night to spoiled rich boy, or was this the best game the Browns have played since they returned to Cleveland?

9:35 AM Dews: I think we saw a Browns squad that is finally playing as well as they should be on paper

SayHey: I think that was a statement game of epic greatness for Cleveland

And it puts Quinn back on the bench

Dews: "Now I'm done"

SayHey: "Now im done"

Dews: bam!

SayHey: Woo

JackGonzo: Nicely done

SayHey: And Stonehands actually did something

9:36 AM JackGonzo: Is the trade deadline over or can we ship Saint Quinn to the Vikings for their first and second rounders yet?

Dews: I will admit, I was shocked to see the score at the bar last night though

SayHey: That game proved my theory.... Cleveland wins when Heiden is their TE

JackGonzo: He would have had two touchdowns if had run full speed after the 70 yard catch

SayHey: Yeh, but his run looked awkward........ i dont think he had footing when he caught the ball

9:37 AM JackGonzo: I think he thought Ross fell down

when he stumbled

SayHey: I think the Quinn experitment is a failure, but if they get a 1 or 2, then its a great trade

Dews: there hasn't been a "Quinn" experiment yet

JackGonzo: Wow, dews theme song just came on my music player

Dews: Which one is that?

JackGonzo: What Is Love Techno Remix

SayHey: Well, If Anderson gave Romeo a reason to be benched, maybe Quinn would play

Dews: haha

9:38 AM JackGonzo: Well it's amazing what our offense can do when we have more then just Edwards as a WR

Stallworth didn't do too much, but he at least attracted attention

Dews: and when Edwards can catch

SayHey: Yeh, I swear i saw Stallworth, but that couldnt be

He is fragile

And weak, and a waste of money

JackGonzo: CityCat first thought it was Cribbs

Dews: I don't understand why anyone trys to cover Stalworth

JackGonzo: Still want to trade him to the Cards for Bouldin

9:39 AM SayHey: Yeh, just let Stallworth run 4 yards........he will hurt himself, game over!

Dews: he can't catch!

let him run deep

SayHey: Youd have to add Quinn to that deal

Dews: what is he gonna do?

SayHey: Boldin is damn good

9:40 AM JackGonzo: They wouldn't take it, Leinart AND Quinn? The Raining Men song would play in Phoenix non stop

SayHey: Leinart is crap

That, and Arizon would get that much uglier

JackGonzo: though I chose the right week to start DA

SayHey: The women that is

9:42 AM JackGonzo: Topic Number two...our own SayHey has determined on his Honeymoon vacation, and we know it is somewhere in Mexico. The question is...how quickly does this become a comedy movie with Petco Park East taking a trip to Mexico?

Jeffrey has left

Dews: haha, oh lord

I wouldn't dream of invading anyone's honeymoon

SayHey: Jesus, where is Seth Rogan with the script

9:43 AM Dews: we'll have our trip to Nawlins

that'll be enough

SayHey: True, but the beer flows like wine in Mexico =)

JackGonzo: i can hear it now...DUDE! What are you doing here? We're on our Honeymoon Cowboyfan...you know this....DUDE!

SayHey: Name that movie and ill give ya a cookie

Dews: haven't had much trouble finding beer recently, gotta be honest

haha

SayHey: I can see CowboyFan stumbling in on us

JackGonzo: I have to agree with Dews, my cup runeth over

9:44 AM Yes, but he would likely think it was M Street

SayHey: Well, make sure you have plenty for a refill for tomorrows debate

Dews: er, I won't be at the debate

neither will you

SayHey: Well, directed more at Jack

Dews: ahh right

SayHey: But we will be at the bar once the debate starts

9:45 AM Dews: wonder if they'll have it on

doubt it

SayHey: Doubtful.......Game 4 of the TB v Dead Sox game is tomorrow

JackGonzo: Ah, I take it this is a KB night

SayHey: Oh yeh

Dews: I'm filling in for Pirates wedensday

SayHey: Or is that game tonight?

JackGonzo: See, and we were gonna have a Debate/ALCS chat, and you two fuck it up in best lewis black voice

9:46 AM Dews: haha

SayHey: Yeh, our speed guys decided that work was more important than sport

LOL dy-no-mite

Dews: I can get you two Sawks Nation guys for the debate coverage :)

and MoDews will be ome

er home

SayHey: Nah, they wont show

JackGonzo: Looks like it will be myself and Skynet, without you two, who'd rather play with big red balls

9:47 AM Dews: who wouldn't?

SayHey: Saux fans never show their faces when they lose

They are like the mighty osterage (sp)

Head in the ground

Dews: Ostrich

SayHey: Ah, good

Dews: dems goooood eatin

SayHey: Hence the (sp) =)

Lets ask Ray fan

JackGonzo: Which brings us to topic number three, thoughts so far on the LCS

9:48 AM Dews: we have a Ray fan?

SayHey: Not really

Dews: really REALLY disappointed in Dodgers

SayHey: We are all Ray fans =)

Not at all

Dews: we are, Tampa

SayHey: I knew they would fuck up

I called that one prior to game 1

Remember...... V is for Victorino

JackGonzo: LMAO someone just offered me Brandon Stokely for Brandon Jacobs

SayHey: Jesus Xrist

9:49 AM With Royal coming back, stokely is a #3 now

Dews: and you said no???

JackGonzo: SayHey is that Xzibit's kid?

9:50 AM SayHey: Nah, I feel dirty adding the CH......hense, the X

JackGonzo: Silly Jews

SayHey: We have our ways =)

Dews: kinda like writing G-d instead ofGod?

JackGonzo: Do the Phillies put Manny and Joe down? Can the Sawx come back and beat the Youth Movement?

9:51 AM Dews: I believe in the Rays

Dodgers I think are done

SayHey: Phillies will own game 5

And I believe in the Rays also......So much momentum and energy

Tough to beat

Especially when Beckett tosses up BP

9:52 AM And Lester getting lit up

Dews: Beckett is all sorts of beat up

JackGonzo: Random note, the Padres actually attempted to send Michael Barrett to the minors, he of course said fuck you, and is now a free agent

Dews: and Lester is FINALLY doing what I picked him to do

SayHey: Im not gonna knock Lester

He proved himself already

JackGonzo: which means Michael Barrett should be a Giant soon

9:53 AM SayHey: One bad game

PFFFFT we have Buster Posey, bratha

AP College baseball player of the year =)

9:54 AM Dews: Posey is not gonna be in the Majors next year

JackGonzo: is he ready right now? Don't you need to keep your age minimum to 36?

Dews: hehe

9:55 AM SayHey: He isnt ready, but Bengie is still solid and ISNT 36......yet

Dews: whens his bday?

JackGonzo: Oh, that's right, you have one of the 36 Molinas playing in the Majors

They're like The U players on a police blotter, they're everywhere

9:57 AM SayHey: Hey, at least they arent felons

JackGonzo: it was an analogy sparky

SayHey: Oh I know

9:58 AM JackGonzo: ok, topic number four...McCain said yesterday (to excuse his supporters for being racists ignorant fuckwads) that people at his rallys call him a terrorist too. The question is, what other bullshit should we expect to see pulled from his ass in the coming weeks?

9:59 AM PhillyFan: Oh wow I am missing out. I would just like to express my happiness over the last few days in sports

Dews: he has to do SOMETHING

PhillyFan: Sorry was in a meeting!

JackGonzo: excuses excuses, Philly always have excuses lol

SayHey: Good question

I do find it funny that Palin mistook her supporters as protestors in Richmond

PhillyFan: Uuuum the worst part.... I fell asleep for the eighth inning!!!

JackGonzo: Of course it's a good question, they're all good questions

PhillyFan: and woke up when it was over :)

MrSanDiego: yo

Dews: There we go, PhillyFan and Mr. SanDiego on boad

MrSanDiego: sorry I am late. Just woke up

Dews: grr

JackGonzo: we'll get back to number four and go back to number three, the LCS, Padres trying to put Barrett to the Minors, and the number of Molinas in the Majors

Dews: I'm downing 5-hour energy drinks like water over here...

10:01 AM JackGonzo: Coffee is spice my son...

he who controls it...

MrSanDiego: aren't there like four molinas?

SayHey: 3

JackGonzo: 36

SayHey: Benji, Jose, Yadier

10:02 AM Dews: and the lesser known Vladimir

kinda the black sheep

SayHey: Ah

10:03 AM JackGonzo: And of course Danny, Jesus, Marical, Rafael, Pedro, Manuel, and Tom

MrSanDiego: LCS

hmm

Rays

and Phils

looking good

SayHey: Total agreement, as I predicted =)

MrSanDiego: as did I

JackGonzo: Very true, and the Phils...can't stop the Rays

10:04 AM SayHey: Nope, not at all

Rays will own Hamels

Dews: Phils couldn't stop Rays or Sawks

JackGonzo: I don't know if they'll own Hamels, but the rest of the staff they will

Dews: the real WS is with Sawks and Rays now

JackGonzo: lol

SayHey: This is true

More like a spanking tho

Dews: Also, would like to recognize Baldelli for his Homer last night, great story there

10:05 AM glad to see him producing again

PhillyFan: Nope

SayHey: Good to see he beat his fatigue

PhillyFan: just wait...all I will say

and then I will laugh at you a'll when you are wrong

MrSanDiego: having some google problems

got kicked out

SayHey: Id like to congrat Ryan Howard for actually doing something this this post season also

PhillyFan: very true :)

SayHey: He had an RBI =)

10:06 AM Dews: he struck out right?

SayHey: Well, yeh

PhillyFan: and he got home

SayHey: But he finally got a hit

PhillyFan: on a wildpitch

SayHey: Victorino is a man possessed

PhillyFan: uuum Stairs? niiiice

SayHey: Lesson to Asian pitchers. Dont throw at his head

JackGonzo: The Phillies aren't so much as winning as the Dodgers are losing

10:07 AM SayHey: Im shocked Stairs didnt keel over due to exhaustion when he ran the bases

JackGonzo: I'd throw at the Hawaiians head

PhillyFan: Yes we are....our offense is doing well

SayHey: Offense is doing well indeed

Dews: Stairs is thriving because he's a professional AL East Hitter

JackGonzo: He knows the rules, it's called OG

PhillyFan: Hi 4 y-o ass was able to jognot sprint!

40

Dews: he played most his career in the Real league

SayHey: pffffft please Dews

10:08 AM PhillyFan: He is also a High School hockey coach in the offseason...

haha

SayHey: Well, he is Canadian

Dews: dude can just flat out hit

has always been able to

JackGonzo: Hell after Victorino I would have thrown at the next guy's hip

SayHey: True, he has a low AVG but he rarely strikes out

10:09 AM JackGonzo: Love that Kuroda kid, not surprised that he's the only starting pitcher really rockin for the Dodgers right now

10:10 AM SayHey: Lowe pitched well last night........he has been solid

PhillyFan: Did anyone see Loge rip his shirt off?

after the first inning?

He was angry. we got to him :)

Dews: I missed it

SayHey: He should be pissed.......Got yanked after giving up just 2 runs

10:11 AM PhillyFan: He sceamed, ripped his shirt down the front, and went inside. I think he needed a replacement :)

SayHey: Im sure that was easy enough, since LA is overstocked with Lowe jerseys

10:12 AM JackGonzo: lol

SayHey: The city wasted all thier money on those damn AndrEw Jones ones

10:13 AM PhillyFan: haha

JackGonzo: Ah, a fine example of why the economy is shit...MLB clubs give all their money to someone like him

SayHey: Yep, 10 mill to play AA baseball

JackGonzo: can I get that job?

MrSanDiego: um

10:14 AM Dews: yea, dibs!

MrSanDiego: I am less worried about Barret than what I read about here

JackGonzo: Most overpaid Minor League player since some guy named MJ

SayHey: And Clonse said he was crap in AA.......so who knows

MrSanDiego:
Padres Moves

SayHey: er, clone

MrSanDiego: second bullet point

10:15 AM SayHey: Epic stupidity

JackGonzo: hmmm

MrSanDiego: If Peavy winds up in a Yankees or Red Soxs uni I am going to give up baseball

SayHey: Maybe the Giants can get lucky and pull a 1-1 with Zito

MrSanDiego: hahaha

SayHey: Wishful thinking

10:16 AM MrSanDiego: given their luck with high priced free agents

JackGonzo: and apparently SsayHey's been sleeping and dreaming this entire chat

10:17 AM SayHey: There is nothing wrong with that

10:18 AM JackGonzo: lol back to topic number four

Dews: I'm genuinely curious to see what McCain pulls

cause, nothing is working

10:19 AM SayHey: I agree

Dews: he went negative, it hurt him

SayHey: Apparently he is releasing his 300th ecomomic recovery plan today

JackGonzo: Wait, something just occured to me...with his comment...

Dews: prolly excellent bedtime reading material

PhillyFan: Random...Palin is speaking at Elon...they will love her there

haha

JackGonzo: nevermind he did say it was Obama rallies

10:20 AM SayHey: I wonder if she will confuse them for protestors also, as she did in Richmond over the weekend

JackGonzo: Flyer fans actually treated her appropriately...but who was the fat Hockey Mom next to her?

MrSanDiego: Two things I found facinating

San Fran Chronicale compared McCain vs Obama to Clinton vs Obama

and it appears that McFail is making the same mistakes

10:21 AM Dews: weird...

how?

MrSanDiego: Quote "lurching from "Only I have the experience to lead" to "I am the only white opponent in this race" to, this week, "I am the scrappy underdog who will fight for you."

JackGonzo: interesting

Dews: hey, its worth a shot

10:22 AM SayHey: Wow, despetare ranks of an old man

JackGonzo: but it begs the question, has McCain ever been an underdog?

MrSanDiego: second thing I am hearing is that many in the Republican party jsut want to cash it in on McCain

SayHey: He claims he has been

MrSanDiego: and stop directing money to him

Dews: he was in the republican primary for a while

at first

MrSanDiego: instead they want it to go to preventing a Demo 60 seat senate

Dews: he's awful at raising money

JackGonzo: Yeah, I've heard that too, and hope to hell the mess is too big for the Dems to fix in four years and so they hang themselves

10:23 AM It may be WAY too late to prevent that

MrSanDiego: because what is bad for them is bad for everybody...

Clint you anarchist

JackGonzo: say it with me, Senator Al Franken

SayHey: You didnt know this?

MrSanDiego: yeah

Maybe a reason to actually watch CSPAN

10:24 AM Dews: no it won't

JackGonzo: that would be a blast watching investigations

Dews: trust me

that'll put you to sleep faster then Wild Wild West

or Contact

JackGonzo: please, you can't stay awake without five hour energy anyways

MrSanDiego: at leat Franken can be funny

Dews: if I get some sleep I can stay awake

SayHey: Battlefield Earth!

10:25 AM Dews: oh lord, there we go

SayHey: This is true

MrSanDiego: oh check this out Obama advertising in video games

too funn

y

SayHey: Because all gamers at 18 and older

Dews: wow

his campaign is so loaded, they can afford this

thats amazing

10:26 AM MrSanDiego: yeah

that he has the money to blow on advertising

JackGonzo: yeah but those voters have to put the control down and leave the house to vote

MrSanDiego: and the line about "John McCain doesn't know what video games are"

JackGonzo: lol

10:27 AM Dews: McCain needs a commercial like the old "Bo Knows" ones

"McCain knows... Blogging"

"McCain knows... Bitches"

"McCain knows... Games"

etc

JackGonzo: how about Palin when responding to the question saying the report finding she did nothing ethically wrong...when it states specifically what ethics rules she broke

McCain knows...trophy wives

McCain knows...skin cancer

10:28 AM MrSanDiego: Then they can feature Levi the high school dropout in one of them

SayHey: Her own Aides warned her about this

JackGonzo: McCain knows...sharp pointy sticks

Dews: McCain knows.... trailer trash

SayHey: Ouch

JackGonzo: lol

SayHey: McCant knows the elderly

JackGonzo: hey he keeps bringing it up

McCain knows....George Washington...they served together

10:29 AM breaking news

Ex-Gop Operative Found Guilty

MrSanDiego: I heard McCain worked his way up from sweeping the floors of Constitution Hall during the first Continental Congress to his position now as senior senator

10:30 AM Dews: Its about time they indicted those scum bags

haha, I like it SanDiego

SayHey: proves that good things happen to those who wait........along time

10:31 AM MrSanDiego: since we are covering the republican crime blotter

JackGonzo: Ted Stevens may be taking the stand today

MrSanDiego:
Upstate GOP politician busted for Kiddie Pron

this guy must have been one of Rudy's boys

JackGonzo: lol

10:32 AM MrSanDiego: but in the interest of being fair and balanced

10:33 AM the transcript on this post is just too much

Mark Foley's Replacement a Cheater

10:34 AM JackGonzo: and I think we just found the perfect district for Dews to run in

Dews: ewww

MrSanDiego: haha

The congressman from Florida

10:35 AM SayHey: Great, another McCant rant, errr i mean speach on CNN Live

JackGonzo: you have fun with that

after I get this posted it's more coffee and NHL 09 for me

this is a blast to read though

Chicago Columnist Smacks Back At Rush

JackGonzo: Finally we will end on this note, as I think a picture is worth a thousand words and this picture pretty much sums it up

The Terrified Right

10:38 AM Dews: priceless

PhillyFan: haha

SayHey: Funny

10:39 AM JackGonzo: and that's all the time we have for one word response hour, join us next time as we move up to two words...good night, good luck, and someone get Dews some burn ointment, he's gonna need it this weekend

NFL Thoughts After Week 2

No team has had worse luck this season then Jimmie's San Diego Chargers. They just barely lose in week one, and were robbed in week 2.

No team at 0-2 surprises me more then the Jaguars, who at one time were my super bowl pick. I don't know what's wrong, but Del Rio better fix it quick.

DeSean Jackson has surprised many folks so far this season, even if he doesn't know where the goal line is.

The Niners are starting to show why I picked them to be my NFC West Champs.

Brett Favre couldn't even beat a quarterback who hasn't started a game since his Senior High School season.

Why won't Phil Savage listen to me and trade Donte Stallworth, and next year's first round pick to Arizona for Anquan Boldin?

Speaking of the Browns, if Romeo Crennel can't turn this thing around don't be surprised if Bill Cowher comes home to Cleveland to finally right this ship.

The Kansas City Chiefs may have the ability to achieve the unbelievable dream of a winless team.

Then again, the Dolphins may have that ability as well.

The Bills will be the team to win the AFC East, mark my words.

Now that I think about it, the Bengals could be the team to go winless as well.

I feel bad for Carson Palmer for playing for the Bengals, the guy has had some of the worst luck of anyone in the NFL.

Is Willis McGahee ever gonna play and get me some fantasy points?

I am completely for changing rookie contracts to look something like the NBA contracts that have a maximum for each pick in the draft depending on order. To offset pissing off the agents, allow them to incentive based to add some of that extra money.

Jim Zorn has done a surprisingly good job with the Redskins so far.

DeMarcus Ware is a man beast and the Eagles are lucky he didn't kill McNabb last night.

Eddie Royal, the first solid NFL player from Virginia Tech since Bruce Smith? Time will tell.

Has any team been affected as much by injuries as the Browns have? Two weeks and at least six starters hurt each game, and yet they've had their chances to win both games at times.

Missing, Braylon Edwards hands, if found please contact the Cleveland Browns front office.

I would still like to see a restructuring of MLB and the addition of two more teams, while moving the Marlins from Florida. Yes, it isn't on the NFL but the thought is still in my head.

NFL Draft Review AFC North

It'll take four days, but each day I will review two divisions on what they did in the draft. Today we're gonna start with the AFC North, home to my beloved Cleveland Browns, who won this draft whether you're willing to admit it or not. The tough thing is that the rest of the AFC North had damn good drafts as well. Perhaps now we will be the team how surpasses the NFC East as the "best division in football". This of course will be tested this year when the two divisions play each other.

BALTIMORE RAVENS
NEEDS:QB, OL, DL, LB, CB, WR,
Draft Picks: QB Joe Flacco, RB Ray Rice, LB Tavares Gooden, S Tom Zbikowski, G Oniel Cousins, WR Marcus Smith, OT David Hale, S Haruki Nakamura, WR Justin Harper, RB Allen Patrick
Approved Picks: Rice, Zbikowski, Cousins, Smith
Eventual Busts: Flacco, Gooden, Harper
Review: I thought the move down to #26 was a great move for the Ravens, another example of Ozzie Newsome's genius. Moving back up to get Joe Flacco though I question. He's going to be a work in progress, I'm not saying that he can't play, but he was a Fighting Blue Hen and they weren't exactly playing the Big 12 every week. Ray Rice was a great move and Zbikowski was a great addition to that defense. The problem with the Ravens taking Rice is he's not going to be starting. Mark my words, they're gonna miss this boat like they did with Derek Anderson and Priest Holmes. They see the talent, but since other folks are already there they don't pay too much attention to them. I think both Ray Rice and Marcus Smith will fall into those categories. I worry though that the owner thought he was drafting Shane Falco and I'm sorry to tell him that Flacco cannot control the Matrix and that you're still very vulnerable at the corner position.
Grade: B-

CINCINNATI BENGALS
NEEDS:DL, LB, S, OT, WR
Draft Picks: LB Keith Rivers, WR Jerome Simpson, DT Pat Sims, WR Andre Caldwell, OT Anthony Collins, DT Jason Shirley, S Corey Lynch, TE Matt Sherry, DE Angelo Craig and WR Mario Urritia
Approved Picks: Rivers, Simpson, Lynch
Eventual Busts: Sims, Caldwell, Shirley
Review: If you're a team attempting to move away from the image of convicts and bad draft choices why do you select a player who quit college once and has major off the field issues? They say he has great ability, almost Glenn Dorsey ability, but if this was true he would have started more then just this year don't ya think? Rivers was the right choice, Sims the wrong one, plain and simple. Now Rivers will be serviceable, he'll play day in and day out, but don't expect him to be a game changer. He'll be the guy who won't lose games for you, but he won't exactly change them either. Taking the smaller school players is a wise idea too, as they tend to work harder, which is something the Bengals desperately need. Any Florida wide receiver taken will be mocked until one proves that they can be a starting and productive member of society.
GRADE: C+

CLEVELAND BROWNS
NEEDS:DL, LB, CB, OL
Draft Picks: QB Brady Quinn, DT Corey Williams, DT Shaun Rogers, LB Beau Bell, TE Martin Rucker, DT Ahtyba Rubin, WR Paul Hubbard and DE Alex Hall
Approved Picks: Williams, Bell, Rucker, Rubin
Eventual Busts: None that I can see
Review:It pains me to almost put Shaun Rogers on the busts list, but then I re-thought it and took him off. He won't play every play and that will make him that much more effective. The Browns now have an excellent rotation of defensive linemen, which will help every facet of the defense. I had a top five sleepers in this draft, and the Browns took two of them in Beau Bell and Ahtyba Rubin. You look at what Rubin was able to do during the Senior Bowl (he owned that game) and you can see what he is capable of. Hubbard is in interesting choice, which could pay off well when JoeJ retires at the end of the season. Rucker is controversial because of Winslow, but understand that both Winslow and Heiden have injury problems leaving Dinkins the only healthy tight end we have. The lack of a corner being drafted is bit interesting, but I think they have their undrafted players targeted and it could be argued that no team in the last five years has done a better job at that portion then the Browns. Alex Hall is an intriguing pick who could turn into a gold mine at the outside linebacker position if he's able to adjust to the NFL from tiny St Augustine.
GRADE: A-

PITTSBURGH STEELERS
NEEDS:WR, OL, DL, CB
Draft Picks: RB Rashard Mendenhall, WR Limas Sweed, DE Bruce Davis, OT Tony Hills, QB Dennis Dixon, LB Mike Humpal, S Ryan Mundy
Approved Picks: Mendenhall, Sweed, Dixon
Eventual Busts: Davis, Hills
Review: This draft the Steelers became the bane of my fuckin existence. After their first two picks I had one reaction, FUCK! I believe that Rashard Mendenhall was the best running back in this draft, hands down. Limas Sweed I love as a player, and it doesn't hurt that he was a Longhorn. Luckily Mendenhall isn't an every down back, but I'm still scared shitless about the speed the Steelers have at running back. Bruce Davis is a bust for me as he's a big under-achiever. Hills can be serviceable, but he wasn't exactly rocking my world when he played for the Longhorns. The pick of Dixon is interesting. I love him as a player, and I think he could be a phe-nominal NFL quarterback, but I think the Steelers took him to turn him into their version of Josh Cribbs. Problem with that plan, like everyone knows, you have to get that from the undrafted pool. I like Humpal who I think can start sooner then Davis can, and if he doesn't he'll be a great special teamer. Same goes for Mundy, he'll be their rocket on kickoffs and punts, trying to tackle Josh Cribbs.
GRADE: A

Monday Thoughts-Let justice be done though the heavens fall

I saw this bumper sticker as I was stuck in traffic on Friday heading towards PA and Jersey. For my money, I haven't seen a better one in a long time, though I did see one that said When Bush Took Office Gas Was $1.46.

Everyone seems to think we paid Donte Stallworth all this money, we didn't. His contract is SEVEN YEARS long, basically giving him $5 Million a year. He has $10 Million guaranteed, so his first two seasons for the Browns are guaranteed. In this day in age that is far from over paying for a player. Now I'm not a Stallworth fan and I would have rather seen them go after Berrian, but he'll take people off of Edwards, Winslow and Joe J.

Hey Cincy, you like apples? We just stole a player who can eat ten truck loads of apples from you because your people don't know how to do paperwork correctly. Finally I have another Longhorn on the team other then the kicker.

Corey Williams, Shaun Rodgers and the Smiths are going to reign havoc all over the AFC and NFC East next year. They're going to take up so much of the offensive line D'Q is going to eat teams alive and Wimbley is going to be scalping some mother fuckers.

I don't care about trading away Leigh Booden, he was a bum who was constantly burned last year. McDonald and Defensive Wright are our future at the corner position, something we haven't had since Minnifield and Dixon.

Tickets go on sale tomorrow for single games at the new Nationals Park. I shall try for opening day, but so will the rest of DC. Hopefully I can get tickets for the Thursday game before the wedding so the guys and I can escape one night and watch some baseball.

I watched JFK last night, and it brought back all those feelings I've been repressing about our government for the last fifty years. Our own people killed a great man because he wanted to change things, he wanted to alter the status quo, and those in power couldn't afford that. I worry sometimes about Barack Obama, I worry that he is too big of a challenger to the status quo like JFK, Bobby and King were and we know what happens to people who want to change the world.

I recently bought Frontline:Fuel of War from Steam since I needed something new. Like many people I've had nothing but fuckin problems with this game. Single Player was fine, but people don't buy first person shooters for single player. It then got completely FUBAR with the different versions that Steam and Kaos/THQ haven't worked out yet. Needless to say it took all day yesterday attempting to fix it, which I finally did (allegedly) at midnight. Great game, great fun, way too much fuckin work that needs to be fixed and sorted out yesterday.

Finally at first look I thought I had missed from Exhibition Football game when I saw that Oakland had beat San Francisco 23-5. I then learned that it was actually the Athletics going over the Giants. The game was so ugly I thought the Giants were being played by Jodie Foster in The Accused.

So Much For Chris Long

Well, I guess Derek Anderson saw the writing on the wall and has signed his new contract, or so ESPN is reporting. I know I was hoping that some team would be stupid enough to give us a high first round pick for DA, but hey what can ya do?

Yes, it's good that we didn't throw this QB away. At the same time, we now don't have a draft pick in the first two rounds. We look to be signing some decent free agents (Cleveland Native Drew Carter is now rumored) so I guess that's where we're growing this year.

We have the cap room, why not make plays for Bernard Berrian, Asante Samuel, Justin Smith, Alan Faneca and Lance Briggs, something, anything.

Free Agency Has Begun

Free Agency began at midnight today and already the Browns have made a phe-nominal move, this time though it was via trade not signing away one of our rivals best players. Corey Williams, the beast from Arkansas State has been traded for the Browns' second round pick and rumor has it are signing him to a six year deal worth around $38 Million. Williams was the defensive tackle the Packers put the Franchise tag on so he didn't hit the open market.

This move of course is able to be made seeing as we likely will have a first and third round pick now that Derek Anderson has been tendered him a one year contract that turns into a first and third rounder when someone like Vikings, Chiefs or Bears sign DA. Unless no one is willing to give up their first round pick to get him, that is possible too. My hope is that Miami will be stupid enough to go after him and then helloooooooooo Chris Long. I'm still not sold on Derek Anderson anyways, when I went to the Niners game I honestly though Brady Quinn was the best quarterback to take the field that day. If this allows us to get a dynamic defensive end we sorely need, then lets do it.

Let's go other some of the other ramblings and rumors out there.

SayHey should be a happy man, as his team has become the Washington Redskins these last few years, signing players to HUGE contracts and they look to continue that trend this year. Alan Faneca, Justin Smith and Bernard Berrian are just a few of the big name free agents out there that the Niners are interested in signing. I for one wish the Browns would go after Berrian as I LOVE this kid and I think he may end up with the best salary out of any free agent this year.

Jonathon Vilma finally has his wish and is reportedly leaving the Big Apple to go to the Big Easy. This is a great move for both teams as the Jets no longer needed Vilma and the Saints need someone, anyone, to play middle linebacker for them.

For some reason the Browns are looking at Donte Stallworth, I have no clue on Earth as to why. I know we need a number three receiver, but if our defense stops giving up so many touchdowns and field goals Joshua Cribbs won't be so tired all the time.

Cleo Lemon, yes 1-6 Cleo Lemon, is reportedly being sought after by the Jaguars. I actually like this move as Lemon is a fighter and should fit well into the mold of that franchise.

The Raiders saved part of their defensive line by signing soon to be free agent Tommy Kelly to a seven year $50 Million or so deal. It's only days away until we start hearing about children being abducted, not doubt for Al Davis' sacrifices to some Sumerian demon so Chris Long can end up a Raider.

The Rams have released Issac Bruce, who should be signed right away by the Niners if they had any brains in their front office.

Fresno State Bulldog and bulldozer for LT, Lorenzo Neal, was cut by the Chargers. I'm sad to see him go, especially since we all know he's going to end up in New England, where all old Chargers go to retire.

The only thing I have for Dews is that the Redskins finally cut Brandon Lloyd who will for some reason likely be signed by the Niners or Jaguars. The Niners, because their front office appears to be that stupid, and the Jaguars because all they do is get lackluster wide receivers. I believe the Skins are still trying to work out the Chad Johnson deal, and as a fan of a team that plays Ocho Cinco twice a year I say, please sell your first borns, as well as your neighbor's and get this cat.

Step One Complete

Phil Savage and the Cleveland Browns have apparently reached a deal with Jamal Lewis that will keep him in Cleveland for at least the next two years.

I never thought I would see the day where I was happy and it involved Jamal Lewis in some fashion. Step one is complete, now to get the deal with Derek Anderson done (and rumor has it that it is very close to being so) and then we can look at the combine and free agency.

In other news Marcus Trufant and Nnamdi Asomugha apparently both have received the Franchise tag. It's interesting to see teams use the Franchise tag this year, they had been holding off these last few years but they are beginning to get more protective. Of course it helps everyone when you keep a player at the top five average salary and not being released onto the market where he likely will cause that number to rise, good for all involved.

Great Ending To A Bad Week

This week has been crap, but as I leave work today I at least have something to smile about tonight.

Many have heard my frustrations with this wanker all season, and thankfully after this you no longer will have to. Hopefully our next step is hiring one of the Ryan brothers to fix this shamble we call a defense.

Hey Grantham, don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya.

Rob Ryan Available

According to reports the Oakland Raiders have fired Rob Ryan. This is sad in one sense since Rob Ryan looked exactly like a Raiders coach should look. His Barbarian hair and beard were perfect for that team, and I think that defense was better then the stats show. This however is GREAT news for those folks like me who believe the Browns should fire our defensive coordinator.

I know the rumor says he's going to be the Jets new defensive coordinator, being friends with Manjackass and all, but he should have some kind of working relationship with Romeo as well and would be a great choice, in my humble opinion, to be our NEW defensive coordinator.